Stories
06-12-2008, 10:07 PM
#2
Nontypical Buck
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Illinois
Posts: 2,466
RE: Stories
OH BOY!!!! i could make this be the longest post on this sites history!
lets see, one time i hit on a girl at the beach two years ago, turns out she had a 6 foot 8 280 pound boyfriend who had a full ride as a tight end to LSU. i ran like hell
um i was molested by an engaged girl that was 25 and has a baby
umm...most of the stories that are funny to look back on are inapropriate for here....sad i know
lets see, one time i hit on a girl at the beach two years ago, turns out she had a 6 foot 8 280 pound boyfriend who had a full ride as a tight end to LSU. i ran like hell
um i was molested by an engaged girl that was 25 and has a baby
umm...most of the stories that are funny to look back on are inapropriate for here....sad i know
06-12-2008, 11:04 PM
#6
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Norwalk, Ohio
Posts: 4,443
RE: Stories
I almost forgot about this story i posted on Huntohio.net 
This is the story of my first squirrel hunt
We were walking through the Milan Wildlife Area when the branches around us started shaking violently. We looked around as i used the Mr. Squirrel Whistle trying to call the little tree rats in so we could blow them to pieces and then enjoy them later on the grill. As i looked up into the trees preparing for a shot, my brother screamed out in agony that something big and vicious just bit him in the neck. I turned thinking it might be some kind of Sasquatch. As i turned i popped the safety off ready to bust some Federal Heavy Field Load 6 shot into Mr. Furry Homosapien. As i turned something hit me in the face and i screamed out in agony. It was trying to claw my eyeballs out. My brother wanted to help but couldn't shoot this invisible creature as it was on my face. My brother ran over to me trying to help me when something hit him in the back of the knees and knocked him to the ground. I could see the fear in his eyes... well partially because my eyeballs were being clawed out. I ripped this thing that was trying to kill me off my face and went to help him. All of a sudden a tree fell down right on me. We started to realize we weren't going to make it out of the woods when a park ranger showed up in the knick of time. He pulled the broken twig off of me and sprayed us with some sort of anti-rabid invisible squirrel spray. The ranger led us out of the woods without further incident. We thanked the ranger for his help and asked him how he was able to get some anti-rabid invisible squirrel spray. He turned and looked at us weird and said i sprayed you with some OFF Deep Woods and those weren't rabid invisible squirrels, they were mosquitos.
The End
This is the story of my first squirrel hunt
We were walking through the Milan Wildlife Area when the branches around us started shaking violently. We looked around as i used the Mr. Squirrel Whistle trying to call the little tree rats in so we could blow them to pieces and then enjoy them later on the grill. As i looked up into the trees preparing for a shot, my brother screamed out in agony that something big and vicious just bit him in the neck. I turned thinking it might be some kind of Sasquatch. As i turned i popped the safety off ready to bust some Federal Heavy Field Load 6 shot into Mr. Furry Homosapien. As i turned something hit me in the face and i screamed out in agony. It was trying to claw my eyeballs out. My brother wanted to help but couldn't shoot this invisible creature as it was on my face. My brother ran over to me trying to help me when something hit him in the back of the knees and knocked him to the ground. I could see the fear in his eyes... well partially because my eyeballs were being clawed out. I ripped this thing that was trying to kill me off my face and went to help him. All of a sudden a tree fell down right on me. We started to realize we weren't going to make it out of the woods when a park ranger showed up in the knick of time. He pulled the broken twig off of me and sprayed us with some sort of anti-rabid invisible squirrel spray. The ranger led us out of the woods without further incident. We thanked the ranger for his help and asked him how he was able to get some anti-rabid invisible squirrel spray. He turned and looked at us weird and said i sprayed you with some OFF Deep Woods and those weren't rabid invisible squirrels, they were mosquitos.
The End
06-13-2008, 01:34 AM
#7
Giant Nontypical
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: California
Posts: 6,440
RE: Stories
Okay I have told this story couple of times and last time I couldn’t remember all the details so again, just using my brain that doesn’t like working with me *straining brain** This happen about 13-14 years ago now. My dad and I were out dove hunting. We were roughly about 50 yards from each other, give or take few, sitting along the fence line that was blocking off the canal. It was just us out there so we didn’t have to worry about other hunters. It was pretty hot that day so we both had lot of water with us. It was kind of slow that day as well and didn’t see much action for about 20 minutes. The old saying goes if you when you least expect dove to fly by, it will. I had to take leak so I just got up and leaned my shotgun against one of poles and did my thing. I looked to my left and up and noticed one lone dove was flying low and starting to go over my dad’s head, who wasn’t even looking in that direction. I figured I would have had good chance to get it so I just grapped my gun real quick, swung around and got it on the first shot. I didn’t realize this but my baby maker was out and swinging in the breeze. My dad, saw this and while laughing, he yelled to me..
“Hey, were you going to *blank* it or shoot it?!?”
I was wondering why I was getting nice breeze down there….
Few other stories regarding dove hunting. I don't remember how old I was but I had to have been about 6ish. My sister and I were sitting on the back of the truck just sitting around talking while our mom was sitting in the cab. All of a sudden, a dove literally dropped dead out of tree branch directly above usand hit my sister in the head. I don't know what starled me more, being attack by dead bird or my sister's scream.
Another time was the classic 'oops, wrong load' event. I was out dove hunting by myself as I usually do. I had some left over pheasant loads left over and most have accidently put them in the target load boxe. Anyway, sometime during which, there was dove that was flying pretty low; I'd say probably about 20 from me. I gave it some lead, squeeezed the trigger then POOF! turned that dove into leathers. Lesson learned; always check your load before heading out to field.
“Hey, were you going to *blank* it or shoot it?!?”
I was wondering why I was getting nice breeze down there….
Few other stories regarding dove hunting. I don't remember how old I was but I had to have been about 6ish. My sister and I were sitting on the back of the truck just sitting around talking while our mom was sitting in the cab. All of a sudden, a dove literally dropped dead out of tree branch directly above usand hit my sister in the head. I don't know what starled me more, being attack by dead bird or my sister's scream.
Another time was the classic 'oops, wrong load' event. I was out dove hunting by myself as I usually do. I had some left over pheasant loads left over and most have accidently put them in the target load boxe. Anyway, sometime during which, there was dove that was flying pretty low; I'd say probably about 20 from me. I gave it some lead, squeeezed the trigger then POOF! turned that dove into leathers. Lesson learned; always check your load before heading out to field.
06-13-2008, 02:06 AM
#8
Nontypical Buck
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Windsor, CA
Posts: 2,279
RE: Stories
first junior duck/goose hunt. my dad said i wasnt allowed to shoot unless it was suicidal or he called it. so im stareing one way, he is stareing the other, then i hear "two over my left shoulder kinda high." as i turn around and a split second before i pull the trigger, he says '"too high dont shoot" i squeze off my shot and one of the two birds fold, my dad shruggs and goes "guess not". the bird was high enough that i stoned it in the air 10yards in front of me and up, and i had to walk another 50 yards the opposite direction, i pick it up and my dad says something like"your a better shot then i expected i guess" i laugh and say "i forgot to take the goose load out of my gun." he found it funny, but later in the day i could have used that load...
same hunt, my dad gives up and justt tells me not to shoot another Sprig(i already got one that morning, almost pulled a double shot the nearest one swung onto the second and didnt shoot cause i realized it was a bull sprig and i shot the hen) and as soon as he lays down i say "heres my specs" abouut 20 specs maybe 30 yards high come strait over me, i shoot one and it falls, i pick my second pull the trigger, and lower my gun, look at my dad and say "got all of my specs now" and thats when i see the first one hit a foot away from his head.
same hunt again, going for my last snow of the day, a flight of snows are flying about 50yards out, ten minutes left in tn the shoot time, so my dad says "shoot the fourth one back" which was a huge snow, i decide to put alot of lead because of the range, so i swung a foot in front of the lead bird's beak and squeeze off the shot. my dad looks at me and said "i told you to shoot the fourth bird, not the ross' behind it!" out of the whole flight of geese i shot the only ross in it....
same hunt, my dad gives up and justt tells me not to shoot another Sprig(i already got one that morning, almost pulled a double shot the nearest one swung onto the second and didnt shoot cause i realized it was a bull sprig and i shot the hen) and as soon as he lays down i say "heres my specs" abouut 20 specs maybe 30 yards high come strait over me, i shoot one and it falls, i pick my second pull the trigger, and lower my gun, look at my dad and say "got all of my specs now" and thats when i see the first one hit a foot away from his head.
same hunt again, going for my last snow of the day, a flight of snows are flying about 50yards out, ten minutes left in tn the shoot time, so my dad says "shoot the fourth one back" which was a huge snow, i decide to put alot of lead because of the range, so i swung a foot in front of the lead bird's beak and squeeze off the shot. my dad looks at me and said "i told you to shoot the fourth bird, not the ross' behind it!" out of the whole flight of geese i shot the only ross in it....
06-13-2008, 09:05 AM
#9
Giant Nontypical
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location:
Posts: 6,498
RE: Stories
Oh boy... where to start. Here are some of the cooler things I've seen/ done.
About 10 years ago I used to babysit for this one family from the city who had a house way up in the woods. I used to take their kids out on little nature walks and teach them the plants and trees and which ones to eat and which ones will make them itchy and which animals are nice, etc. mostly just to keep myself entertained because the kids weren't allowed outside normally. The kids were Millie - 2 yrs old, and William, 4 months old. Millie ran around the corner of the house chasing something -- what I assumed to be a butterfly or something, and disappeared for a few seconds. I was carrying her little brother so it took me a minute to catch up. There she was, her hands buried in a female black bear's fur saying "Doggie!" over and over again. The bear didn't care at all until it saw me and took off, dragging her for a second because she refused to let go. We didn't tell her parents. [8D]
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About 8 years ago I used to work at a local ice cream store in the town I grew up in. I lived in a rather famous ski resort town known to everyone in and around NYC. I loathe the fact that they come up to my town pretty much because I hate anyone from the city... but thats for a different story. They're usually horribly demanding, wanted their ice cream yesterday, and then don't want to pay for it. I was mobbed on this one particular day and didn't have time to even look at the people I was waiting on when I heard a really familiar voice that was very polite. I made the sundae he wanted and walked him down to the cash register and looked up and was stunned. Sylvester Stallone everybody. Rocky himself, Rambo giving me money for his ice cream. I almost fainted. He saw my eyes get really big, told me that I had to BREATHE and signed a receipt for me to keep. He was AWESOME!
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Tim Mcgraw and his wife built a house right next to Derek Jeter's on the ski slope. I drive by them a lot
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I was grooming my horse when all of a sudden he took off, went thundering across the field to a group of the other horses, started stomping and kicking and screeching, then came carrying something back in his mouth. He killed a copperhead and brought it back. Must have heard the other horses discussing it or something, I dunno. Still have its skin. This horse loves to bring me stuff, he brought me a baby duck once. Picked it right up out of the pond with his lips by its little stubby wing, came trotting over and handed it to me. Momma duck was in tow and wasn't happy. She chased him for about a half hour before she realized I put the baby back. I can't leave the brushes out because he'll pick them up and carry them around. He'll even put his own leadrope in his mouth and lead himself. His brother once stole a whole pizza out of the back of my truck.
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A short list of ambulance/fire calls:
-Kid's arm ripped off still moving.
-Dead body start twitching. ---> scared the crap out of me, demanded we pull over and I ride in the front after that.
-Person start talking to me after a few minutes of CPR & AED, told me the AED hurt
-Performed a successful CPR on a Great Dane puppy that fell into a pond
-Rescued a deer from a resevoir
-Rescued a deer from a tree - got his foot stuck in the fork of the tree and was hanging
-Rescued a fawn after its mother was hit by a car
-2 plane crashes within 3 weeks of eachother on the same mountain top -- next burmuda triangle?
-Took a moose out of a swimming pool with DEC
-Performed a successful interior fire rescue and resuscitation
-Saw a guy jump off of the highest falls in NYS - Kaaterskill Falls, and live. Just wasn't his day.
There's lots more but I've been at it for a while and don't remember them all right now
About 10 years ago I used to babysit for this one family from the city who had a house way up in the woods. I used to take their kids out on little nature walks and teach them the plants and trees and which ones to eat and which ones will make them itchy and which animals are nice, etc. mostly just to keep myself entertained because the kids weren't allowed outside normally. The kids were Millie - 2 yrs old, and William, 4 months old. Millie ran around the corner of the house chasing something -- what I assumed to be a butterfly or something, and disappeared for a few seconds. I was carrying her little brother so it took me a minute to catch up. There she was, her hands buried in a female black bear's fur saying "Doggie!" over and over again. The bear didn't care at all until it saw me and took off, dragging her for a second because she refused to let go. We didn't tell her parents. [8D]
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About 8 years ago I used to work at a local ice cream store in the town I grew up in. I lived in a rather famous ski resort town known to everyone in and around NYC. I loathe the fact that they come up to my town pretty much because I hate anyone from the city... but thats for a different story. They're usually horribly demanding, wanted their ice cream yesterday, and then don't want to pay for it. I was mobbed on this one particular day and didn't have time to even look at the people I was waiting on when I heard a really familiar voice that was very polite. I made the sundae he wanted and walked him down to the cash register and looked up and was stunned. Sylvester Stallone everybody. Rocky himself, Rambo giving me money for his ice cream. I almost fainted. He saw my eyes get really big, told me that I had to BREATHE and signed a receipt for me to keep. He was AWESOME!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tim Mcgraw and his wife built a house right next to Derek Jeter's on the ski slope. I drive by them a lot
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I was grooming my horse when all of a sudden he took off, went thundering across the field to a group of the other horses, started stomping and kicking and screeching, then came carrying something back in his mouth. He killed a copperhead and brought it back. Must have heard the other horses discussing it or something, I dunno. Still have its skin. This horse loves to bring me stuff, he brought me a baby duck once. Picked it right up out of the pond with his lips by its little stubby wing, came trotting over and handed it to me. Momma duck was in tow and wasn't happy. She chased him for about a half hour before she realized I put the baby back. I can't leave the brushes out because he'll pick them up and carry them around. He'll even put his own leadrope in his mouth and lead himself. His brother once stole a whole pizza out of the back of my truck.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A short list of ambulance/fire calls:
-Kid's arm ripped off still moving.
-Dead body start twitching. ---> scared the crap out of me, demanded we pull over and I ride in the front after that.
-Person start talking to me after a few minutes of CPR & AED, told me the AED hurt
-Performed a successful CPR on a Great Dane puppy that fell into a pond
-Rescued a deer from a resevoir
-Rescued a deer from a tree - got his foot stuck in the fork of the tree and was hanging
-Rescued a fawn after its mother was hit by a car
-2 plane crashes within 3 weeks of eachother on the same mountain top -- next burmuda triangle?
-Took a moose out of a swimming pool with DEC
-Performed a successful interior fire rescue and resuscitation
-Saw a guy jump off of the highest falls in NYS - Kaaterskill Falls, and live. Just wasn't his day.
There's lots more but I've been at it for a while and don't remember them all right now