What’s the proper balance of family (or significant other), chores and hunting?
#11
Fork Horn
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 362
That is the challenge. Finding balance and sharing with the chores and making family time. I have a hard time also. I am a single dad with a four year old boy and a live in girlfriend. I just changed jobs and the one I have now doesn't allow me anytime to hunt during the week when I don't have my son. I get him 50% of the time. So that gives me every other weekend to hunt. Tack on spending one on one time with the girlfriend and that weekend nearly disapears. Not only that since gun season just started the woods look like a Tennessee Vol football game and sounds like a shooting range. I mo longer have the woods to myself when I could hunt during the week. How I balance it? Bottomline, my girlfriend understands. She got up and watched my son opening day bow season. Do something "extra" other then spending normal everyday time.
#12
Typical Buck
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: NY: NYC to Watertown
Posts: 897
Think this is a fair topic that's not often discussed.
Everyones situation will vary.
Some live in the woods, some live near the woods.
Others like myself live far from the woods, and try to take advantage of every chance to be outdoors.
Personally I try to stay home and do what needs to be done before having my time out.
Even if the task seems trivial. And seems like your missing some good hunting to go to some snot nosed kids bday party at chuckecheese.
I rather have fewer days/trips out. Hbut have those days with peace of mind.
Everyones situation will vary.
Some live in the woods, some live near the woods.
Others like myself live far from the woods, and try to take advantage of every chance to be outdoors.
Personally I try to stay home and do what needs to be done before having my time out.
Even if the task seems trivial. And seems like your missing some good hunting to go to some snot nosed kids bday party at chuckecheese.
I rather have fewer days/trips out. Hbut have those days with peace of mind.
#13
Typical Buck
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: NY: NYC to Watertown
Posts: 897
Think this is a fair topic that's not often discussed.
Everyones situation will vary.
Some live in the woods, some live near the woods.
Others like myself live far from the woods, and try to take advantage of every chance to be outdoors.
Personally I try to stay home and do what needs to be done before having my time out.
Even if the task seems trivial. And seems like your missing some good hunting to go to some snot nosed kids bday party at chuckecheese.
I rather have fewer days/trips out. Hbut have those days with peace of mind.
Everyones situation will vary.
Some live in the woods, some live near the woods.
Others like myself live far from the woods, and try to take advantage of every chance to be outdoors.
Personally I try to stay home and do what needs to be done before having my time out.
Even if the task seems trivial. And seems like your missing some good hunting to go to some snot nosed kids bday party at chuckecheese.
I rather have fewer days/trips out. Hbut have those days with peace of mind.
#14
Typical Buck
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: North Dakota
Posts: 959
I'm taking advantage of all the kid-free time that I have for now. My wife and I are working on having a kid.
I do have a very understanding wife and she works every other weekend. I get out as much as possible, but I never but her on the Back Burner. I hunt more than enough. I can't wait to have a kid though, even if it does cut into the hunting a little bit for the first couple of years. If there are chores around the house, I wait for 1 or 2 gripe sessions from her before I put off hunting
EDIT - that last sentence made it sound like I put her off,,those are just the weekends that she is working that a put off the house work
I do have a very understanding wife and she works every other weekend. I get out as much as possible, but I never but her on the Back Burner. I hunt more than enough. I can't wait to have a kid though, even if it does cut into the hunting a little bit for the first couple of years. If there are chores around the house, I wait for 1 or 2 gripe sessions from her before I put off hunting
EDIT - that last sentence made it sound like I put her off,,those are just the weekends that she is working that a put off the house work
Last edited by Buck_Slayer; 11-22-2010 at 11:21 AM.
#15
Nontypical Buck
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 2,358
OK, let's not get too extreme here. You're acting like I said that I leave for work before everyone wakes, get home after they've gone to sleep, hunt all day Saturday and don't see them at all, and somehow disappear on Sunday.
There's nothing wrong with me bouncing this off the hunting community to see what they have experienced. Also, I know all about what it is to raise these kids. I was without a job for almost two years and stayed home with them (additional context for ya).
I'm trying to determine what exactly is putting something before my family, and what is a reasonable expectation. I mean, if I wanna go out one night and play poker, is that putting poker before my family? I don't think so. You might!
There's nothing wrong with me bouncing this off the hunting community to see what they have experienced. Also, I know all about what it is to raise these kids. I was without a job for almost two years and stayed home with them (additional context for ya).
I'm trying to determine what exactly is putting something before my family, and what is a reasonable expectation. I mean, if I wanna go out one night and play poker, is that putting poker before my family? I don't think so. You might!
Why do you care about what my wife and I do? Are you going to use that as "ammo" to negotiate with your wife? is that fair? Nope.
Never accussed, or meant to accuse, you of ignoring family. This my two points where:
- Talk to your wife about this, not us.
- Family time comes and goes. What you need to do for your family this year may change for next year, and it WILL CHANGE for 10 years from now.
Family comes first. Simple as that. That's also a simple and vague statement. What you agree works for your family might get your friend in divorce court, different family, different people, different situation.
#16
Spike
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 70
That next days off she was cleaning the house and I was watching TV. She asked me to help. I responded. "Baby. I cleaned so much when I was living in the barracks, that I refuse to do it now."
You miss-understood me! We get these threads on here all the itme "my wife doesn't understand me" blah blah blah. What my wife, his wife and your wife say and do with respect to hunting will probably be very different. Asking us is wrong, asking us what we do is wrong. It's irrelevant, it's 100% a discussion between you and your wife. What you guys agree to is what's right, simple.
Why do you care about what my wife and I do? Are you going to use that as "ammo" to negotiate with your wife? is that fair? Nope.
Why do you care about what my wife and I do? Are you going to use that as "ammo" to negotiate with your wife? is that fair? Nope.
Folks that dont ask opinions of others in order to help them make better decisions tend to learn things very very painfully.
Last edited by M92; 11-22-2010 at 01:14 PM.
#17
Fork Horn
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 252
I am super duper lucky! I am just hitting the one year mark of living with my fiance, wedding is in January. My hunting land is only 15 minutes from the house. She actually TELLS me to hunt and if i take a few days off, she questions why. I was suspicious at first but she basically said she'll never tell me I couldn't go as long as there are no real things going on at home. The only time I'll have a problem is when we have kids and she needs help. So anyway, I've spent the most time in a tree in my life this past year. Either she has a boyfriend on the side when i'm gone (which i'd gladly accept during hunting season ), or she truely wants me to do what i love. Since I can hunt during the week, I make sure to take her out over the weekends to do what she wants. I know all of this will end eventually but I'm loving it while i got it!
#19
I can't relate as I had moved down here to go to college...BUT when I moved here I was obsessed with fishing,,,,so..I took the boys with me..yes even at 10 months old..Mom wife enjoyed me giving her a break..I LOVED MY BOYS...still do..
Honestly..I would be taking my boys hunting as soon as possilbe..BUT if it does come to choosing between hunitng and family..It must be family all the way..
THEN
AND
NOW { -;
Honestly..I would be taking my boys hunting as soon as possilbe..BUT if it does come to choosing between hunitng and family..It must be family all the way..
THEN
AND
NOW { -;
Last edited by Chuck7; 11-22-2010 at 04:00 PM.
#20
Typical Buck
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Free Union, VA
Posts: 750
10 years married in a blended family. Couple years back my wife was sick. I didn't go out at all that year. Didn't want to. She is well now and I am hunting this year. I am hunting every chance I get. As I told her, " I'll hunt every day I can unless I fill my tag before the end of the season." She misses me, but doesn't give me a problem. I work long hours....don't want to, but must for my job. During the rest of the year I do what needs to be done for her and the kids. Hunting is about the only thing I do for myself any more. You have to work it out in your own situation.